I’ve got baggage I’m told, man ain’t that the truth

I’ve been through more battles than Arnold it’s true

My past is a dark one mired in blood

My knees buckle under the wait I don’t know how much more I can take

I’m still learning however to trust my God’s plan

I carry around an incredible load the secrets I hide I long to let go

Jaded perhaps, baggage a yes

But at the end of the day I’m doing my best

It is not only I who carries this load

My God and redeemer wholly upholds

My baggage I give Him to carry and hold

His strength and His power can handle the load


I am very zealous for the Lord Jesus Christ. I do not say this to brag or boast, truly no. The Only Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is all I have, and I’ve found all i need. I’m on fire to preach the Gospel of the Risen Savior. zealous indeed.

I am reminded of that while zeal is a gift from God Almighty, it must be based upon absolute truth and exercised in love and wisdom with discernment. I seek to speak the truth fearlessly in the Lord, by His power. I do not however desire this God-Given, and God-Pleasing passion to be used for evil. In and of myself, in my zeal I can be harsh, cold and offputting. The enemy of our souls is very eager to distort,twist and manipulate. The Gospel is offensive enough on it’s own due to its assault on our sense of pride and self-worth. I do not want the enemy to use the God-Given fire within me to scatter rather than gather.

I have found I must remain iin the Word daily as to not preach falsehood, opinion, and nonsense. Further, I must remain in prayer, complete dependence upon the Savior.

I do not want to push people away and exult self in any way, may we point to Christ and Christ alone, for His glory, honor and praise.

“Even zeal is not good without knowledge, and the one who acts hastily sins” (Proverbs 19:2).

“Anyone who is not with me is against me, and anyone who does not gather with me scatters” (Luke 11:23).

“If I have the gift of prophecy and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so that I can move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing” (1 Corinthians 13:2).

“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” (1 Peter 3:15).

Dearest lord we thank and love You so much! We are nothing without You Lord Jesus. We are indeed zealous and pray we would be eager to preach the Gospel, always ready to give an answer for our hope. May we be wise, loving, kind and patient in all we do: led by Your Spirit, preaching truth in love as we ought. May You Lord Jesus increase, and we decrease. In the Lord Jesus’ name. Amen.


My tasks are wise in my eyes so the saying goes

I reap I sow for good I hope and see where it leads

I scatter seed abundantly not caring where it lands

I have to ask however if this is in God’s plan

Forgive me Lord for taking the lead for doing things my way

I pray instead that You direct and guide me each and everyday

I do not know what’s best You see in spite of hopeful work

I ask Dear Lord to direct my steps and plant me on what’s firm

Without Your will I scatter off and do not gather still

Please Dear Lord I ask for wisdom to gather as I should

I’m weak and proud and make missteps in everything I do

Please forgive me Lord, guide, lead, renew that I may do your will not mine no matter what the cost

To You alone I owe my trust and find my way in You

*So, some thoughts, futher on contemplating this topic of work for the Lord, especially regarding sowing. Indeed, unless the Lord blesses an undertaking, it is doomed to fail. Thus we ought always pray for guidance, leadership, strength, direction, and wisdom to honor the Lord and do, think, and be as we ought.

However, in regards to sowing seed, preaching the Gospel, the only Gospel that saves of fallen man headed for hell (under the righteous wrath of a Holy God), the Lord Jesus Christ took on human flesh, lived a sinless, perfect life, suffered and died on our behalf (penal substitutionary atonement), rose victorious the third day to return to judge the living and the dead. Freedom, forgiveness, righteousness in Christ alone, grace through faith in The One and Only Savior. Calling all to repent and believe the good news is so be spread in abundance.

I do not need “special direction” to proclaim such, but a willingness to proclaim in love, truth. and by the power of the Lord within me.

Indeed all effort if not the Lord’s will is in vain. However to do that which He desires (the Great Commission), is absolute, God-Honoring, and always appropriate indeed. Preach the truth of the Gospel, nothing but, but preach nonetheless!

Father, much praise and thanks for all You have done, do, and will do. Thank You so much for saving us in Christ Jesus, we love You Lord and know we don’t and can’t deserve what You have done. Please guide and lead. Please direct our steps, please empower us by Your Spirit to faithfully, fearlessly, and lovingly preach the Gospel. May we always be eager and ready: make us advocates Oh-Lord for Your kingdom and glory. In Christ’s Holy name. Amen.

Said better than I

Here is an excellent sermon from pastor, Alistair Begg of Truth For Life. He explains the difference between religion and rebirth, relationship with the Risen Lord, Jesus Christ: being guided and indwelt by the Very Spirit of God as opposed to walking in the flesh and “playing Christian.”

Begg’s ministry has been a tremendous blessing in my walk with Christ: his Biblically grounded, no-nonsense, compassionate approach to teaching is powerful.

Please check it out. Much blessing, love, peace,purpose and hope in Christ Jesus our Only Lord and Savior! Our Lord lives, reigns and shall return: it’s not “religion:” all about a relationship with the Risen Lord!

Father God, much thanks for all You have done, do, and will do! Praise You Lord , Jesus Christ for dying for me, for suffering so I could live and live in abundance. We pray Dear Lord that we would not be religious, we are led by You Living God. Relationship, rebirth, life itself is You. please guide, lead, direct. please draw people to Yourself away from religion and nonsense: please use us as advocates to point to the Only Savior the Lord Jesus Christ in all we say and do. For Your glory, honor and praise, Lord Jesus. Amen

Truly Amazing!

Praise God!  All glory, honor, praise and worship!  Please pray for an encounter I’m in the midst of.  I went out to witness and met, Dwight, a homeless man who was planning on killing himself with drugs (a mixture of a ton of methadone and other drugs).  He’s safe, dumped out the chemicals and has heard the Gospel, has been given a Bible and is being worked on by the Lord. May his heart be made good soil and bare much fruit to the only Savior!    Please pray that the enemy is silenced and that he gains rest, trust and healing in, Christ Jesus. May, Dwight pass from death to life in Jesus,  being born-again. Our Lord is truly remarkable!  

I am utterly amazed right now, our lord is truly remarkable indeed, I’m so honored to have been found useful for His purpose.

Please brothers and sisters pray for, Dwight: that the enemy shuts up, that he gains rest and strength in the Lord. please pray pray for guidance, protection, focus rebirth: full trust in the Lord, Jesus Christ. Please also pray, Dwight finds housing, and relief from chronic pain and a history of alcohol abuse.

Our Lord is indeed greater than he who is in the world: praise the Only True Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!

Why Bible?

So, we’re supposed to, suggested to study the 66 books of the Bible, Old and New Testaments. Why is that? If you’re like me, a bit of a rebel you may feel yourself tensing up at the suggestion.

“Who, me, why?!” Well for a lot of reasons, let me share. Firstly and foremost, the Holy Bible is the very Word of God (if you’re seeking apologetic defensense of this fact it is abounding: e.g. prophetic accuracy and validation for one). It is absolutely trustworthy in what it teaches, and as such is an entirely reliable guide for matters of life, faith, and Practice.

It explains the situation we’re in as humans, this broken-world, sin, it’s effects and outcome, and most amazingly what God Himself has done to provide reconciliation and freedom from the mess we’re in and have indeed made ourselves.

further, it is the sole standard by which we are to judge doctrine. In a world drowning in false-religious-experience resulting in a myriad of false beliefs and professions, the Holy Scripture stand as the proof for recognizing truth and falsehood. Yes indeed, as true believers in the Risen Lord Jesus Christ (being born-again in Christ Jesus having repented, fully trusting in the Lord Jesus Christ alone to save), we have the Holy Spirit within us, guiding, leading and molding us into the image of the Beloved Son Jesus Christ. However, as the Holy Spirit Himself inspired the Word of God, He will not “reveal new revelation” contrary to what has been once for all entrusted to the Saints regarding what God has already revealed in His Word. The holy Spirit reminds us of the Word: study-it-up!

We live in a time of obsession with mystical-religious-experiences. “Hey” I’m often asked, “did you experience anything from your suicide attempt?” Why yes, yes I did. No, no nothing secret, no, no “gnostic-knowledge” only available to those who come insanely close to utter-demise.

I realized/realize I’m a serious sinner, everything I’ve done and do is absolutely against a Holy and Absolutely Just God. I’m in serious trouble! I was headed full-steem barrel loaded and cocked to hell itself (pain, just punishment, separation from God for all eternity… forever!). Quite sobering indeed. The fear of the Lord indeed is the beginning of knowledge (Proverbs 1:7)

what am I to do, I thought?! Let’s see, a pervert, a drunk, a thief, a blasphemer, a glutton, lazy, idolatrous, oh, and a murderer. I’m not looking so hot! I can’t “outweigh the bad” with “good,” I have no good (as filthy rags Isaiah 64:6).

So for a time it was despair indeed, so I survived a suicide attempt to know I’m headed to hell? Wow!

Not so fast I say! The Lord Jesus Christ paid for every despicable act I’ve EVER done, has paid the price in full! In Him and Him alone I have forgiveness, righteousness, new life, purpose and peace. WOW, PRAISE THE LORD JESUS CHRIST! AMAZING INDEED!

I did not get secrets that aren’t available to everyone. This is madness, read your Bible, tell people, the Lord Jesus Christ already did it all!

Further, try taking on the reading of your Bible as a study of the promises of God for His children. In the Lord Jesus Christ we are indeed true children of the Almighty Father God…WOW, fantastic! Since God does not and cannot lie, and since He wrote the Scripture’s, they aren’t lies. The Bible is the promise book of God to His children: He outlines what happened, what will happen, and what’s best until we are with Him.

And yes, I know, “you know already.” Read it again and again. It’s living, God will transform you through it and keep you from wandering off into falsehood. it isn’t an inflight magazine, “well glad that’s outta the way.” The Word of God is indeed living and active, put in the time and effort.

please brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus, read your Bible’s. Stop asking for new, new, new while ignoring what He has already, faithfully, and finally given to us for His glory and our HIGHEST GOOD.

“Daily dwell on God’s promises to you. Hide them in your heart and always remember not one word has failed of all His good promises” (1 Kings 8:56).

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17 so that the servant of God[a] may be thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17).

“and all the ways that wickedness deceives those who are perishing. They perish because they refused to love the truth and so be saved” (2 Thessalonians 2:10).

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).

“The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and follow deceiving spirits and things taught by demons. Such teachings come through hypocritical liars, whose consciences have been seared as with a hot iron. They forbid people to marry and order them to abstain from certain foods, which God created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and who know the truth. For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, because it is consecrated by the word of God and prayer.

If you point these things out to the brothers and sisters,[a] you will be a good minister of Christ Jesus, nourished on the truths of the faith and of the good teaching that you have followed. Have nothing to do with godless myths and old wives’ tales; rather, train yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come. This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance. 10 That is why we labor and strive, because we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all people, and especially of those who believe.

11 Command and teach these things. 12 Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity. 13 Until I come, devote yourself to the public reading of Scripture, to preaching and to teaching. 14 Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through prophecy when the body of elders laid their hands on you.

15 Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress. 16 Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.” (1 Timothy 4).

“Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth” (John 17:17).

“He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your ancestors had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD” (Deuteronomy 8:3).

Father God we praise and thank You for your mercy and grace: thank You for giving us new life in the Blessed Lord Jesus Christ. Lord forgive us for neglecting Your Word. the enemy has sown tremendous doubt and falsehood. Please return us tonYour Word: may we meditate upon it by Your Spirit often, craving the pure spiritual milk that only Your truth provides. Return us to Your Word O Lord, for Your glory we pray, in the Lord Jesus Christ’s name. Amen

wow, just wow

My past if pretty dark as anybody who knows me and/or reads my blog will know. Utter depravity is my past, a total testament to the absolute undeserved, unmerited mercy of God in the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I am forgiven, cleansed, new, and changed in Him, by Him, for Him.

I’ve been thinking; I do that from time to time 😉 Trying to figure out how it all went wrong. I know sin, rebellion and following this fallen-world, its ways, and ruler is to explain. However, at the root of all of it was insane pride. Absolute ego. Love and exultatation of self. From the way I looked, to how I spoke: ego, ego, ego, me, me, me lol. To highlight, let me share a memory. After my suicide attempt, while the Lord was working on me, I recall praying to the Father: “you know, God, You could really use me to reach people…”Astounding indeed lol. I’m embarassed by such ridiculousness, and SO thankful for our Lord’s patience, forgiveness, mercy, and on-going work of sanctification in Christ Jesus! It’s humbling to know that it took me literally loosing everything, to have nothing to “offer” God, nor anyone, to come to true faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

I am blessed, so blessed to know the Only Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. It is an absolute undeserved honor to preach the Gospel. He “needs” nothing from me, you, nor anyone…truth! He’s willing to use us for His glory, purpose, to reach a dying world with the beautiful Gospel of Christ Jesus indeed, but “need me,” not so much.

Father God, praise, thanks, love and adoration to You! thank You so much for saving us in the Lord Jesus Christ. You do not need anything, Lord God. we need You! May we humbly, passionately, joyously, and faithfully do Your will. May we preach as we ought, in true love, humility, passion, and truth..All in, by, and of You Lord Jesus Christ. Amen

NAMI Interview with me

Here is an interview I did recently for NAMI (National Alliance Of Mental Illness). If you’re struggling with depression, hopelessness, and contemplating suicide, please please hold on! Please turn to the Living Lord Jesus Christ, in Him and Him alone is life. I’m not telling you to “be religious,” no, not at all!

Christ Jesus lives, forgives, cleanses, loves, and hears and heals: seek Him out! I hope and pray this video encourages you, you’re not alone my friends, and remember that in the Lord Jesus Christ is new life, forgiveness, freedom and hope! And, no, I’m not “setting up” the, Savior as a means of “temporal worth only”

I do indeed have joy, peace, and purpose in the Lord Jesus Christ. These are wonderful gifts given from knowing Him. However, it is ultimately the forgiveness and reconciliation found in Christ alone that saves us from the wrath to come. We will all stand before a completely holy God and in Christ Jesus alone can we stand righteous and be forgiven.

Yes, we still face hardship even as a disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ, I do not deny that. Amazingly, He is with us through it all! “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength” (Phillipians 4:13).

Much faith, love and much hope to you and yours,


White lies

It’s just a fib, a partial truth

What harm could it really do

It’s not flat out but partial still

We call it “white,” not quite “fib”

I used to deal in such disguise

To hide the truth behind tiny lies

One thing I’ve learned in my years

These fibs you see they are quite real

An omission here, and add-to there

we loose the message we seek to bare

Perhaps it’s time we told the truth

To stop the games, no more cry-wolf

I see now in my age, of growing older with each day

that tiny lie can be the path of life and death, heaven or hell

So be it full-news what you bring

Don’t “misplace words,” truth only sing

I prefer the facts more these days

I’ve grown quite tired of lies from any sage

if it hurts to hear and so what

I know with time I’ll handle such

Please don’t distort the facts my friend

The details are the truth, the omissions are what makes your statement stand

A coin

I’ve been thinking, odd I know, Evan thinking, outrageous! 😉 yes indeed turning to Christ involves true repentance and faith (trust).

These however are not to be thought of as two separate things. They are really two sides to the same coin. You find out how despicable, corrupt, and hopeless you are before an all holy God, realize the true nature of sin (pure evil, disobedience, resulting in death), how God hates it, will indeed punish it, the Lord Jesus Christ being the sole, only means of reconciliation to the Blameless Father.

We turn from this corrupt world, its ways, its lusts, its pleasures, its “ruler” (satan himself) and follow instead the true Lord, God, Ruler and King, believing His ways better than ours and this fallen-worlds. Trusting in His sacrifice as our only means of redemption.

I just get nervous in thinking or portraying it to be a “two-part system.” You can’t have repentance without faith, and you cannot have faith without repentance. They are married in the miracle of rebirth: moving from death to life.

Further, it is by God’s grace, power, and mercy alone we repent. Our flesh can do, and does nothing!

And further further, repentance and faith are not a “one time deal.” We live as believers in the Only Risen Lord Jesus Christ by constant faith (trust) and continual repentance. We sin (we sadly do still even as we are actively undergoing sanctification), it is revealed to us something by the Spirit that dishonors the Lord. We come before the Lord confessing our sin, asking forgiveness, trusting the absolute grace and mercy of the Savior.

No, “well I’m glad I got that whole faith and repentance thing out of the way.” Our lives are to be constant growth in the Lamb, constant dependence, constant focus, constant trust, constant communion. We live in and from grace-to-grace, growing, learning, and following daily.

In the end ALL glory, honor, praise, power, and authority are the Lord’s and His alone!

Sigh *wipes-brow. I’m happy I got that off my chest lol. I pray you all have a fantastic weekend: the Lord bless, strengthen, and keep you brothers and sisters!

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” (1 Peter 2:9).

“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36).

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:8-10).

“For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light, for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness, and truth. Test and prove what pleases the Lord” (Ephesians 5:8-10).

“The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you–they are full of the Spirit and life” (John 6:63).

“If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make Him out to be a liar, and His word is not in us” (1John1:8-10).

Epic quotes

here are some of my favorite quotes I’ve come across in my walk of faith with my lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I pray you find them helpful, encouraging, thought provoking and beneficial.

“God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.”

C. S. Lewis

“Stay alive for the future you, the one yet to come who is created out of what you will overcome” unknown

“Faith is not the intellectual acceptance of a body of doctrine; faith is faith in a person” William Barclay

“Religion says”do,” Jesus says “done.” Unknown

“I need to be saturated in the Word of God. What God is saying to me is more important than what I say.” Unknown

“Be more like Jesus–God uses Scripture to mold and make us into the image of the Savior.” Unknown

“If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end despair” C.S. Lewis

“God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself Because it is not there. There is no such thing.” C.S. Lewis

“The devil is orthodox in his beliefs. Mere intellectual ascent is not saving faith.” Unknown

“In the Lord Jesus Christ I have been saved from sins penalty. I will be saved from sins presence.  And I am being saved from sins power.” Unknown

“If we would be sound and healthy, we must stand in agreement with the truth of God’s Holy Word.” Unknown

“Enter the gymnasium of the Bible: Be fit in the faith!” Unknown

“Read your Bible, pray, pray, pray to grow, grow, grow!” Unknown

“It takes a whole Bible to make a whole-Christian.” Unknown

“It takes a complete miracle to believe the life-saving Gospel by Word and Spirit!” Unknown

“We are to be utterly humble–we did nothing, the Lord Jesus Christ did everything!” Unknown

“I have no righteousness of my own. Zero hope in and of myself.” Unknown

“We should rejoice, I say rejoice! We have ALL in the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!” Unknown

“If I can’t see I won’t believe, yet if you don’t believe you won’t see.” Unknown

“Christianity equals reason humbled to the obedience of faith.” Unknown

“Come to the holy Scriptures humbly, consistently, and prayerfully.” Unknown

“Great people talk about ideas, average people about themselves, and small people about others.” John C. Maxwell

“If you’re  not talking about  Jesus you’re not the subject!” Unknown

“Your mind will always believe everything you tell it. Feed it faith. Feed it truth. Feed it love.” Billy Graham

“Better tho’ difficult, the way to go, than wrong, though easy, where is end is woe” John Bunyan Pilgrim’s Progress p.46.

*Prudence: “What is it that makes you so desirous to get to Mount Zion?” *Christian: “Why, there I hope to see him alive, that did hang dead on the cross; and there I hope to get rid of all those things, that to this day are in me an annoyance to me; there they say, there is no death, and there I shall dwell with such company as I like best. For I tell you truth, I love him, because I was by him eased of my burden, and I am weary of my inward sickness: I would gain be where I shall die no more, and with the company that shall continually cry, Holy, Holy, Holy” John Bunyan Pilgrim’s Progress p. 54-55