The face of sins reward

I’ve always been pretty stubborn. Perhaps you can associate. I always had to find out for myself, take “the hard road.” If someone suggests something i listen and go about my way. If I’m ordered to do something i immediately rebel. As a result of this hard-heartedness you see, is my rather chaotic life. I’mContinue reading “The face of sins reward”

Under pressure

We’re all under pressure, right? Most defiently: pressure from the inside, pressure from the outside, pressure all around. Family, friends, work, finances, expectations, decisions, etc., etc. A lot going on each and everyday! Mr. Bowie, and Mercury had it right! 😉 Imagine with me something: say you won an exorbitant amount of money, say 10Continue reading “Under pressure”

Loosing the mask

I’m comtemplating loosing the mask. Letting my “freak-flag” fly lol. For those not knowing what I’m referring to, let me explain. My shotgun suicide attempt left my face pretty messed up. I use the mask to reduce stares, to cover it up so it’s not so noticeable. Is this right, I wonder? Well I doContinue reading “Loosing the mask”

At odds

Welcome: please join me on this journey of introspection! I’m perplexed in understanding my past, my involvement in the church and my apostasy and in the end attempted suicide. What I mean is was I saved? I confessed Christ and was involved in the church and studied theology in depth. So there are three possibleContinue reading “At odds”

Vanity of vanities

In our society it seems there is an epidemic of mental illness. Hopelessness and despair runs rampant….why is it so, you may ask…I know I surely do. Perhaps is not an epidemic of mental illness. perhaps it’s a legitimate reaction to the futility, hardship and perplexing nature of our lives as humans? Look at itContinue reading “Vanity of vanities”

Reminisces of an idolater

In reminiscing about my past, trying to make sense of the blatant contractions, I’ve come to realize a hard truth. Let me start at the beginning. I was raised in a new age family. My dad did psychic readings for money. I was indifferent to religion. This changed however when I met J. Her familyContinue reading “Reminisces of an idolater”

From death to life

So, where to begin?! I’m honestly still trying to make sense of it, but something I realized after stands out to me. I had dealt with depression for years on and off and struggled with a constant feeling of not belonging or having purpose or reason to live. I went in and out of hospitalsContinue reading “From death to life”