X-Rated

Like Somdom Gomorrah, a sinner to the core

My past behavior survives in common Colorado lore

A creature of wrath imputed, deserved, and fully owned

I have no fingers to point except toward my own

Perverse, drunken, prideful and crass to name but a few

My past isn’t R rated, but X-rated it’s true

I do not write these things to boast as I did before

The things I’ve done are ugly leading only to my doom

I do not brag or boast in these or have excessive guilt

You see my Savior has redeemed me and spared me from all gloom

Next time you hear my story, do me just one truth

Glorify my Savior, I’m here by His grace it’s true

No longer will I relish in sin and pride and lust

I have a bigger purpose to point to Him Who’s Just

No longer x-rated as before, but a sequel to my story or redemption to begin new blessed lore

Reliance

I’ve come to an awesome and somewhat terrifying reality. I have no family to rely on in this life. I’m a yankee far from “home,” living alone in the South with a traumatic brain injury and having survived a serious suicide attempt with a shotgun…Things are a bit hectic and tough lol. What am I to do?!

After I lost everything, physical looks, money, vehicle, possessions, self-esteem, and any worldly attachments, I’ve been relying on myself quite a lot. I’ve learned a lot about myself through this: grown tremendously and changed a lot

Most of all I’ve discovered I’m not alone in this. Jesus my God, Savior and Lord has been my rock: and His Church has been my anchor! I cannot imagine doing this on my own, and am so thankful I don’t need to. The road is rough, treacherous and uncertain, but I know my guide is absolutely trustworthy and knows the way home! I am so thankful for God’s protection, provision, guidance, and mercy in all this. I’m so thankful for Christ’s body, His Church in caring and loving as He.

I am not alone! I’ve lost the whole world and gained it back as it should be one hundred fold! We are not alone in, Christ: take heart brothers and sisters, our, God lives and reigns, and is with us!

Father God we praise and thank you for your care! Thank You so much for Your provision of us, for guiding, leading, and protecting us. We love you Lord, You are indeed a Good Good Father! We rely on and glorify You completely, in Christ’s Holy name. Amen

Edit

Opaque, seethrough, totally bare

My mind and my thoughts are not concealed

He knows my past, my present and all that’s to come

We lie to ourselves “He’ll never know,” so the story goes

Our book is bare, every thought and letter fully aware

We lie to ourselves thinking we’ll do it on our own

Our God knows our thoughts, our decisions and vice

The result is quite startling to realize this truth

Our God is the reader, our life is the proof

So can I suggest one thing if I may

Live life each day knowing He knows, that your thoughts and desires, struggles and pains it’s all true

The Creator knows all, not only our names

So give Him control to write as He wills

You’ll find that nobody’s edits are better than His

Wanderer

A vagabond a wanderer of sorts

What guides my steps is chance and hope

I carry on with pack in hand in search of someplace to call my own

A wanderer yes,wounded quite so

I’ll carry on pack in hand Searching for a new start in a new land

Step by step I make my way discovering and learning as I go, Will we meet I do not know

I’ve found by now an impactful truth, my home is not here, you see it’s true

My home is far away, too far to see

My Lord and Savior died for me

my place is with Him, and by His will I continue on striving for Him still

Virus

Virus! Virus! The shouts cry out around the world

What am I to make of this fact, the earth grows hot, diseases spread

I know you’ll say it’s not that bad

Too bad this is the only world we have

So grab your gloves and masks real quick, Hand sanitizer will do the trick

For me I say let it go, this world will end I know it’s so

Keep your masks and fear of death

I’ve got one better than all that

My Savior Jesus holds me fast, so be it if taking me home is His next task

The End afoot

Wake up people! Look around you at the chaos. As you can tell the weather by signs so we can tell the day by signs occurring. The days are evil, the world is in chaos with natural disasters and plagues surfacing. The Lord Jesus Christ returns soon: repent and believe the good news please! And I know, “people have been saying this for ages past.”

If you do not stand in Christ’s righteousness you will stand in your own which is none at all. Truly truly I beg you get right with the Lord!

To my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ remain strong, focused upon the Risen Lord and be at peace amongst the chaos. Be about the Father’s work, preaching Christ Jesus and doing the works commanded by Our Lord.

“Then Jesus told them a parable: “Look at the fig tree and all the trees. When they sprout leaves, you can see for yourselves and know that summer is near. So also, when you see these things happening, know that the kingdom of God is near. Truly I tell you, this generation will not pass away until all these things have happened. Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will never pass away” (Luke 21:29-33).

“When these things begin to take place, stand up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near” (Luke 21:38).

Most Merciful, God we praise and thank You for Your love, guidance, and ways. The days are evil Lord, good is called evil and evil good. The earth is in chaos as You shake the heavens. We know the Lord Jesus returns soon. Please open eyes, awaken hearts and minds. Save the lost please Lord. Please protect Your people, Your Church. Raise up to boldly and fearlessly proclaim You, Lord Jesus Christ. In Your holy name we pray. Amen

Baggage

I’ve got baggage I’m told, man ain’t that the truth

I’ve been through more battles than Arnold it’s true

My past is a dark one mired in blood

My knees buckle under the wait I don’t know how much more I can take

I’m still learning however to trust my God’s plan

I carry around an incredible load the secrets I hide I long to let go

Jaded perhaps, baggage a yes

But at the end of the day I’m doing my best

It is not only I who carries this load

My God and redeemer wholly upholds

My baggage I give Him to carry and hold

His strength and His power can handle the load

An apology

Please forgive my spelling errors and punctuation mistakes, as I know there are quite a few. I get excited writing, I’m using a rather cheap phone, well, and a rather inexpensive laptop without a word processor. Oh, and also I have only one eye so I tend to miss things lol. But praise, God I can see at all! I’m also thankful for all He provides. My eye is set upon The Savior, Praise God! Any-who, I appreciate your patience in checking out my blog, and hope it’s being of benefit in your walk with our, Lord Jesus Christ: keep your eyes on the Savior, seek and serve the King!

Ownership rights

We are not our own my friends! Wait, Evan, say what! Now I know in our Western thinking, and overall fallen states of mind this assertion is rather offensive, but it’s true nonetheless. You see, while we are individuals having free will which we can use as we see fit (which has worked out wonderfully in the ways we’ve used it *cough, cough: sarcasm), we are not our own. We are owned, full legal ownership by the Creator of the universe. This includes those who insist Our Creator does not exist. Try telling your mortgage company you don’t acknowledge their ownership of your house…oops.

Now, even more amazing is the fact as followers of Jesus we are owned, by purchase of His precious blood by, God Himself! We are not our own, for, “we were bought with a price.” A very high price, the blood and suffering of the Very Son of God! In, Christ we are redeemed from the powers of sin, death, and the devil. We no longer belong to the ruler of this world, we walk totally cleansed in newness of life and hope. This world, it’s focus, its ways are not ours any longer. We are free to know and serve Our King in newness of life: praise, God!

What does this mean? We are free from the obsessions of this life, called to follow our, Savior as we await our true home with Him who purchased us. Let’s live like we are: son’s and daughters of the Living, God! In, Jesus we are made a, “… a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light” (1 Peter 2:9).

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;  you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

As He says in Hosea:

“I will call them ‘My People’ who are not My people,

and I will call her ‘My Beloved’ who is not My beloved,”

and “It will happen that in the very place where it was said to them,

‘You are not My people,’

they will be called

‘sons of the living God.’” (Romans 9:25-26).

Most Merciful, God, thank You so much for redeeming us by the Precious blood of You beloved Son, Jesus. Your love is absolutely amazing, Your mercy unimaginable. We pray that we would more fully understand Your calling, the Freedom we have in Jesus, and to walk in newness of life. May we be overflowing with joy, peace, and purpose in, Christ. May we know we are not our own. May we understand that You own us, and what that means. Please strengthen us to walk in the absolute freedom won for us in, Christ Jesus. We love and adore, worship and praise. In our Lord and Redeemer, Jesus blessed name. Amen

Under pressure

We’re all under pressure, right? Most defiently: pressure from the inside, pressure from the outside, pressure all around. Family, friends, work, finances, expectations, decisions, etc., etc. A lot going on each and everyday! Mr. Bowie, and Mercury had it right! 😉

Imagine with me something: say you won an exorbitant amount of money, say 10 million dollars. (I first wrote one million as that to me is amazing wealth lol, but today “not so much”). It would be thrilling, amazing, yes?

Now imagine the pressure placed upon you as to what to do with it? Charities, ministries, helping the needy and downtrodden, most assuredly! The pressure felt by yourself and the expectations of others would be overwhelming. And if you were a believer, you’d desire to honor the, King and do His will of course. “What if I mess up?” “What if I fail to do as I should with what I’ve been given?”

Now, with me imagine that instead of getting a large sum of money, that you survived sure death through an extreme event. People die from what happened to you but you survived miraculously . Say an insanely high fall, a natural disaster, a fire, or perhaps, just maybe a serious suicide attempt.

I am in that latter group. I survived getting shot point blank in the roof of the mouth (hoping to hit my brainstem) with a twelve-gauge shotgun loaded with buckshot. People do not survive that! I am shocked and utterly amazed with the fact that I am alive: yes, I’m messed up from it, but I AM ALIVE!

I have an always present awareness of the mercy I’ve been shown, wonder at the awesome power of our, God, and much thanksgiving. Now, in addition to that, I’m under a lot of pressure from myself and those I associate with. I’m expected to inspire others to be strong and forever thankful. And I try to be and am. My point is, what do I do with all that pressure: self-imposed, and outside?

Well, I’ve come to an amazing conclusion. I am alive, not by my strength, power, or any means of myself in any way. I am alive by, God’s power, mercy, and grace alone. I live for my Savior, not perfectly by any means, no, but for Him nonetheless. I survived not only by His power, but for His glory and for His purpose.

What do I do with the pressure? I come before my, God with fears, with a lot of regrets, and the absolute knowledge I am forgiven by, Christ! I am alive by His will and to His glory alone and always. I pray the Lord uses me to inspire, to encourage, to exhort, to give hope and to preach the gospel. I pray I may live up to what our God has planned and purposed for me!

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven” (Matthew 5:4-16).

“The servant who knows the master’s will and does not get ready or does not do what the master wants will be beaten with many blows. But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked” (Luke 12:47-48).

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change” (James 1:17).

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11).

“As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace: whoever speaks, as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen” (1 peter 4:10-11).

“Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; the one who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does acts of mercy, with cheerfulness” (Romans 12:6-8).

Mighty God, praise and thank You so much for Your power, grace, purpose, and redemption: You live Lord! We are unworthy of all You do and have done. We ask, Blessed Lord that You will be glorified through us. Please use all our past, present, and future for Your glory. May we be fearless disciples of the Risen Savior, set ablaze for You, Only True God. May we bouldly tell of all You’ve done, keeping our eyes upon The Savior. We love and adore, worship and praise in Jesus’ name. amen.